Saturday, August 13, 2011

Day 13 - Who the Hell Are You People?

Tonight, just for fun, I decided to look up the stats on my little tiny blog.  It's been nearly two years now, let's have a look-see.  I rarely track my stats, since mom and her two co-workers don't read much, but I was completely shocked by what I found.

FIRST - I'm over 300 posts, and nearly 100,000 page views, which is nutty like a fruitcake.

SECOND - Five out of the top ten referring sites to my blog are Russian sites.  Written in Russian.  Why are these non-English speaking websites in Russia referring readers to my blog?  Honestly, the first thing I think is that they are hacking into my computer to get to my bank account, in which case, let me save you some time, Czarina - there's nothing there.  Gwyneth Paltrow's site is, you'll have better luck over there.  My second thought is that they are using me as a drone site to hack into other people's websites, because let's be honest, how many Russians are really reading this for fun?  Am I just being used by the Russian mob?  Let me know if any of you have insight into this.  (Comment:  "No, we are for to like your funny humor site and not to for what you say?  Hacking?  Ignore this and continue with funny humor that links to banks.  Love, Svetlana)

THIRD - Here are the top searches people use that lead to my site.  No shit, people.
  1. a day in the wife: 11
  2. porn in kids books: 11
  3. day in wife:  8
  4. a day in the wife blog:  3
  5. big stripe mosquitoes: 3
  6. grandmas facial: 3
  7. penis trauma: 3
  8. daily schedule of a hooker prostitute: 1 

 Penis trauma I get, but Grandma Facial?  Where the hell did THAT come from?  Who ARE you people?  And why does anyone want to know the daily schedule of a hooker prostitute?  So they know when to schedule their breakfast meeting?  Honestly...I'm thinking it's the Russians.






Jeanette said...

Oh my god, that's really funny. Google can be so entertaining! Porn in kid books....?

Rhonda said...

i've never checked my might be interesting to know how people find me!

i love the penis trauma.

Nikki said...

I love the weird keywords people use to find sites. I don't have any really funny ones, but I've had like thousands of visitors looking for info on Steve Burns from Blue's Clues. I mentioned him in one post, and only briefly, and yet he's my biggest source of random traffic.

Mel said...

Great job on all of those posts! You are very prolific! Can't wait to read more of your thoughts on the daily schedule of the hooker!

Echo said...

I just presented you with the versatile blogger award :)

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